The old ones are the best....

It's my birthday today, in times past this would have meant a wild night away in a hotel accompanied by way too much food and drink....This year? Well, we walked round to the corner shop (7 minutes, 10 seconds) and got a bottle of wine and a bag of crisps each. On the walk back we spotted a big kite being flown on the grassy patch next to our house and decided to check it out. Never been in the "park" in the three and a half years we have lived here. Better than expected. We walked to the bench and sat for me to have a rest, just in time to see the kite wrapped around the nearest tree...... We opened the crisps (not the wine!!!). Andrew had Walkers new offering - Chilli and Lemon flavour. Wrong, wrong, wrong......just not working at all. Spicy, lemony, crispy, yukky. Me? Lovely bag of Smiths salt "n" shake. Did I share? No, It's my birthday!

The paper run

On your marks get set .... go. 8 mins 23 sec to the local Londis for a couple of papers and a pint of milk. Return trip 7 mins 44 sec.

Will keep you posted on further runs.

Cheesy leeks......

Yesterday was my first out patient physio appointment and our first trip back to St. Georges hospital since they wheeled me out on a stretcher to The Wolfson. Whilst wandering along on my stick to the Physio department we bumped into my surgeons registra. A rather portly Canadian chap, who I kid you not practically wet himself on the spot to see me walking. He practically RAN into the hospital no doubt only to burst straight into theatre and proclaimed, its OK! She can walk!! Our careers are saved!!...

What with it being Wimbledon this week the weather is awful. Wet and really unseasonal cold....We decided to cheer our selves up with some good old carb's and comfort food. Roll up Cheesy Leeks...! Basically this is fried leeks, fried bacon, some spring onions and a really cheesy sauce in a dish - baked in the oven. Yummy and comforting served over jacket potatoes. Only about 4,000 calories a serve. We could barely move off the sofa for the rest of the day. Shouldn't be food for June though........

Finally its gone dark...

The very first night we spent in our house both Andrew and I woke (very early) in the morning and commented that as well as getting rid of the hideous lilac on the walls we needed some blinds. That was on a dark January morning three and a half years ago. A lot has happened in that time but still no blinds graced our windows.

Four months ago I finally ordered some, and yesterday Richard came round and did a wonderful job of putting them up. I was previously in charge of DIY, Andrew has not a clue. He's going to have to learn..!!!

Last night we slept in a properly dark room and I actually slept in for the first time EVER in this house. Can't believe it took us so very, very long.

This is the way it is

It might appear that life should have become easier for us upon Mel`s release from hospital, however this is not proving to be the case. We had a lovely few days in Rye, removed from reality. However the world of personal chefs and tea in bed is not where anyone other than a lottery winner or a Russian oil tycoon can stay for long. Still, not even an oil tycoon can buy health and mobility. Mel is going to have to regain what function she can through hard work and determination. Even with that her recovery will never be complete, she will be permanently disabled, it will always be making the most of what she has. We all take for granted we can move, walk, swim, jump, stand on tip toes.... The realisation that her fight has only just begun can sometimes seem overwhelming. Coming to terms with this will be a long and painful process.

We have just had a wonderful (and slightly drunken!) evening with the hosts of The Wood Vale Diaries, who have helped us believe that we can keep on moving forward and shown us that friendship and love will truly conquer all. Peace, Love, Respect and a massive thank you to WOOD VALE DIARIES!!!

Bye, Bye Wolfson

We have been quiet on the posting front....I was finally released from the care of the NHS Wednesday lunch time. We have wizzed down to Rye to celebrate and are currently holed up in a suite at The George in Rye. It's amazing to only have to share the room with Andrew, be able to choose the channel on the tv and not hear the drone of electric wheelchairs. Which brings me on to, well, wheelchairs. Clearly I have now used up my portion of NHS funding. The wheelchair they have dispatched me with (top picture) can only be described as a right old bone cruncher. I am also, frankly, embarassed to be seen in it. Whilst out and about in Rye today we spotted four old dears in the same model. I dont mean to seem ungrateful, the NHS have been very good to me but I have an image to protect here! I'm very lucky that I can walk, however the distances I can manage will be short and slow, therfore a decent wheelchair is as important as a good pair of shoes. And its an excuse to shop........ I have spent some time surfing this afternoon and have my eye on a "Street classic". Check it out!!!

Food I am dreaming of........

I am lucky, although I am "hospitalised" during the week (although only till Wednesday!!!) I can go home at the weekends. Other's are here full time. The food is terrible. Like, really, really terrible. I have no idea how they expect people to get well on it. Earlier today a few of us sat around talking about foods we miss whilst here and what we would eat RIGHT NOW if we could. The following were loving talked about...

Nutella on toast.
Southern coated "curly fries"
Pink wafer biscuits dunked in hot chocolate.
Roast Chicken.
Big Mac, minus the gherkin.
Banana and sugar sandwich.
Pickled onions.

Tinned Mackerel in mustard sauce.

Pistachio ice cream.

This reminded me of conversations that Andrew and I had about food whilst travelling. After months of rice and curry I developed an extraordinary craving for breaded deep fried garlic mushrooms. The type you get at the Harvester, with dip. I was determined I was going to have some as soon as I got home......needless to say once home the thought of crossing the threshold of a Harvester once again filled me with the proper amount of fear. I wonder how many people will actually be making these "missed foods" part of their celebratory meal upon release?

Wireless Festival

Whilst I was still in hospital and pretty much completely paralysed Andrew bought tickets to see Faithless at the o2 Wireless festival. This was a moment of great faith and optimism on his behalf. At this point we had no idea if I would be able to move, then there was of course the consideration that the last time we went to the Wireless festival I managed to get so completely wasted early doors that I had to be taken home in disgrace.
As the date approached we nearly decided not to go. I still cannot walk far, tire easily and find large crowds daunting. We also were unsure how to get there, how people with disabilities would be treated etc, etc..........

Luckily we binned this defeatist attitude and decided to go - Andrew drove, I took the wheelchair.

We had a great time! The facilities and treatment were 1st class, a credit to the festival and the charity Attitude is everything who work to improve access to live music for disabled people. The disabled entrance was well staffed - by disabled people - everything was well explained and off we headed to the disabled stand. This was right in front of the hospitality stand, to the left of the stage, with a great view heaps of space, friendly attendants and its own roped off, super clean (security guarded) toilets.

Andrew could not believe his luck! They bought him a chair over and everything!!! Even the dance tent had a viewing platform. We visited this early on in the evening when it was so quite mellow so I had little opportunity to throw many wheelchair shapes.

We pottered around for a while before heading back to the viewing stand, the only hairy moment coming when after three pints of Tuborg (bad ten years ago when I 1st tried, no better now) I though I might have a bit of a walk,luckily Andrew persuaded me that the middle of the park with thousands of people on the move was not the place............

Mark Ronson put on a top performance, we revelled in our view, a clear line of vision to the main stage, over the crowds and to much of the rest of the festival. 9 pm came around and Faithless burst onto the stage all guns blazing with Insomnia. The performance was slick and well polished, however any new stuff they played could not hit the highs of the classics. I even managed a bit of an uncordinated dance to God is a DJ. Standing, holding onto the railings for dear life. Andrew looked a little concerned at this point, think he was worried about being thrown of the platform!

We left just before the end, nothing to do with being worried about me and the crowds leaving, Andrew had forgotten a jumper and was freezing! We finished the night with fish & chips on the way home. Perfect, bring on Bestival!!!

Relaxation

Here at the Wolfson each patient has an individual weekly timetable. This week a new session appeared on mine for today - Relaxation Group. I am unsure why I had suddenly been put into this group one week prior to my discharge and not before, but thought that it may teach me some relaxation tools to take away and would therefor be of some benefit. How wrong I was!!

The first problem is that the concept of relaxation in a grotty room in a 1960's hospital with all the related noise is difficult before you start. Still, 7 of us sat there prepared to put that to one side and give it a go. The second major problem for me was that some of my Occupational Therapy sessions have involved me typing in a bid to improve my left hand. I have mainly been copying what ever has been at hand, a paper, leaflet...or on one occasion what I thought was an example of a relaxation session. Turns out it was THE relaxation session. So as the OT started to read in a monotone voice I could see myself sat at a desk struggling to type...not very relaxing. As the session progressed my mind just kept wandering, I just could not focus on "floating away weightless, totally supported, surrounded by a soft sunshine yellow". ( How is that meant to feel???!) I just could not stop thinking about the typing and how she was literally reading word for word.........Soon though I was in uncharted waters, I am unsure if she went off programme or if she was still reading, ( my typing slow!!) But she was now talking about how we should all imagine we were walking barefoot down a soft sandy Caribbean beach with gently lapping waves. All I could think about was that my stick would probably get stuck in the sand and that I can't walk barefoot!! I'm sure that I have a very bad attitude to this type of thing and that I am a right old cynic but I cant help thinking I am very glad I did not have to go every week!

Which way to go?

As Mel only has a week before her departure from the Wolfson, we spent most of yesterday afternoon with the social worker filling out a 62 page application form for DLA (Disability Living Allowance). Having never claimed any form of benefit before it was a new world to us both. The allowance comes in 2 parts, the first being the care component and the second being the mobility component. The social worker was a dab hand at filling out these forms and you could sense that her use of words had been skillfully streamlined over the years to maximise each applicants chance of being awarded some level of benefit. After a good 2 hours we finally completed the booklet and then moved onto an application for a blue badge, a freedom pass and a taxi card. Even though Mel has been brilliant over these last 9 weeks and is constantly moving in the right direction , the afternoon spent with the social worker was still highly emotional and highlighted to us both that we still have some way to go. I think we have reached the point where she needs to leave rehab and start to ease her self gently back into home life and start hanging out with me, her cats and all her friends. To be honest with you I could do with putting my feet up!

This week I have mostly been drinking ..............

With the Yoof of today turning to Magners and your average street drinker favouring White cider never before have our orchards been under so much pressure to deliver. The word in cider space is there are not enough trees and we all know what that means. We have done our bit and planted an apple tree in the back garden , sadly this will yield no Frosty Jacks for a good four years.

In the meantime we will be mostly drinking Kopparberg pear cider from Sweden. A deliciously crisp, medium dry cider perfect for the summer.

Do your bit, help to save the environment and guarantee that white lightening is freely available for generations to come. Plant an apple tree today.

Kopparberg is currently on special at your local Sainos for just under £2 a bottle.

Today I have been out and battled with public transport........brave at the best of times, with my current mobility one would have to argue virtually insane. Surprisingly I managed OK with both the bus and the tram, not great and I would not do it on my own for a bit but I did OK. What was however quite worrying and something that I will no doubt have to get used to, was the magnet I was for all the nutters that circulate the transport system once the rush hour is over. Clearly they took one look at me hobbling along, realised that I could not get away and would therefore be perfect to chat to. In the space of a 30 minute bus ride I encountered the following.

A chap who described his motorbike accident - 30 years ago - to me in graphic detail.

Being shown the train route between East Croydon and Brighton on a large map by a large guy with an even larger shopping trolley.

Two people who asked me straight out what was wrong with me (how rude!!)

And my personal favourite......

A gentlemen in purple lensed sunglasses who offered to get me a "high vis yellow jacket". This apparently would be no problem, he has contact's at the council.

The beauty of the treadmill

I managed to steal a few hours today for myself in between work and visiting Mel and spent it running on a treadmill. Its something I found myself doing 5 times a week until Mel became poorly. Lots of things seemed to fall into place today and thankfully there seemed to be light at the end of a very long tunnel. As the funky beats from " Fools Gold " kicked in on my i pod shuffle I felt for the very first time that we were going to conquer this situation and be better people for it. It was a lovely feeling and then i thought ........ only 15 sleeps to go and that was even better.

With every heartbeat

When you feel a little down and things are stacking up against you , its nice to hear a piece of music that brings a tear to your eye and gives you the encouragement to move forwards. Proving that Sweden has more to offer than Absolut and saunas, Robyn brings you " With every heartbeat" a fantasticly cheesy house tune that sounds like it's straight out of the late 80`s. This will be massive and right now we are loving it! ( The wife also made my day when she discovered Robyn is playing Bestival, must remember to pack my white gloves and glo sticks)

Pointless Pamphlet

Last night I went to our local gym with Andrew and Helen my Physio to set up an exercise programme for my release.It must have looked bizarre. I can hardly walk, yet there I was approaching the cross trainer! Huge swathes of equipment were dismissed as being way above me, others simply had the problem of where to hang ones walking stick whilst using them. ( I can't imagine why the manufacturers had not foreseen this particular issue!)
I now have a programme, although it will take me as long to walk between the equipment as use it!


This morning my calf was injected in 4 places with Botox.It hurt,a lot. I'm sure that smaller needles are used to inject into peoples forehead's, but still, are they mad? The pain was however short lived and now I just have to wait for the toxins to take effect. While waiting I have a lovely leaflet to read. Under the title "Understanding Spasticity and the role of Botulinum Toxin" it has a picture of a lady - in the Lotus position! Who designs these things??? Still if Botox can flatten out your forehead AND get people who can only just walk into the Lotus position it is truly a wonder drug!